It was a pretty bizarre feeling, finally having to plan my own wedding. I had been photographing weddings for so long, and seen so many different kinds of weddings, and to be honest, I hadn’t really ever thought about my own! I know some girls dream about their wedding day for years, know exactly what they want, and can’t wait for the 1 day in their life when they can feel like a beautiful princess – but that was not me.

Serious.

I never pictured myself in a white dress (I’m practically as white as you can possibly get already, have you SEEN ME? Scottish/Welsh ancestry pretty much took care of that. So really, putting me in white dress would basically mean I would DISAPPEAR). I don’t like a lot of attention (despite this fact) and Luke and I are both pretty laid back, non-fancy people. So yeah. Planning a huge event was something that I (like a lot of you future and former brides out there!) didn’t really have any experience in.

In the end, we had a fantastic day! Luke and I kept all the decisions as simple and uncomplicated as possible (which had my mother FREAKING OUT) and the day was total smooth sailing. But what, if anything, I did I learn from my OWN wedding?

I guess this qualifies to go in my ‘advice from former brides’ category that I do on here, but this time I’M the former bride!

SO.

Have the wedding YOU both want.

Your wedding doesn’t have to be a huge, lavish, expensive affair (unless, of course, that’s what you WANT!) Let your wedding reflect who you ARE as a couple. Are you a bit goofy? Do you guys love 90s dance music? Are you into making references to your favourite TV shows that others probably won’t get at all^*? Then let your wedding show all of that! You and your guests will enjoy a day full of your combined personality. That’s why they love you, right? There are a lot of old traditions that still buzz around ‘the wedding’, but you don’t have to have any of them if you don’t want. I didn’t wear a veil because I thought it was terribly old-fashioned (plus, I didn’t like it’s traditional connotations). Both of my parents walked me down the aisle because they both raised me equally (if anyone is ‘giving me away’ [insert roll eyes here] then it can be both of them!!). I didn’t wear a garter or toss a bouquet, and Luke and I didn’t have a traditional ‘waltz’ (we danced to Huey Lewis and The News instead. :D). We just wanted to have a really fun party with all our friends and family and that’s exactly what we had!


*I may or may not be describing myself and Luke here.
 

Do your best to take time out for yourself before the wedding.

You’re going to have A LOT of people around you in the days leading up to, and on the day of, your wedding. Which could result in an almighty headache! (I woke up with one on my wedding day!) I recommend some quiet time, if you can get it. Go for a walk or have a bath. Chill out. It’s not supposed to be stressful, it’s supposed to be fun and joyous. And if you’re not sure that you can be responsible for yourself chilling out, have a family member or a girlfriend be your guardian! “She can’t see you right now, she’s taking a nap!”
 

Chat with your photographer about the little things.

Of course – there has to be a photography tip in here! This is something that, as a photographer, I really try to concentrate on anyway at every wedding I photograph, but it hit home just that much more when I became a bride! Did you do heaps of DIY for your wedding? What did you do/make? Is that ribbon around your bouquet that colour for a reason? Do you have people playing a part in your wedding who are really special to you? Are there elements of the day that are particularly important to you? Maybe you won’t think of it 'photography-wise' at the time, but if you chat with your photographer about details before the wedding, he or she might be able to take a photograph of something seemingly insignificant to everyone else but really important to you!
 

Wedding videography is underrated.

DID I MENTION HOW MUCH I FREAKING LOVE OUR WEDDING VIDEO? Ahem. Look into it, because it’s super fun and you’re only doing this once right? RIGHT?

The biggest thing I can say to you is – be yourself. I know it’s a little cheesy, but it’s the heart of the truth. And enjoy the whole process!!

Having now been a bride myself I feel like I’ve got something more to take in to each wedding that I photograph. I’m now seeing weddings through two sets of eyes – bride and photographer! Double the vision! Woah! Or four eyes? Mmm.

In case you missed it, Rebecca and LJ were married last year in a beautiful garden ceremony at the Benowa Botanical Gardens on the Gold Coast. Rebecca wore an AMAZING wedding dress that was made by her mum (right?!) and had to be one of the most radiant, ecstatic brides I have ever photographed.

This is Rebecca’s advice to future brides:

Ensure you get to know your photographer by having an engagement shoot, so you’re comfortable in front of the camera. That was one of the best things we did before our special day! It meant that we were way more relaxed in front of the camera for the actual event. Also, booking your reception at a venue that does everything for you makes everything so easy; you just walk in and walk out and don't have to worry about a thing on the day. Try having your ceremony and reception close by so that guests who are travelling don't have a long drive between venues. And if, for unavoidable reasons, you have a big gap between the ceremony ending and the reception starting (like we did), make sure there is a pub or a cafe nearby for your guests to hang out at for the time in between! Surround yourself with the people you love, keep it simple and don't sweat the small things. Keep that in mind and your day will be bliss. :)

Thank you Rebecca! I hope you, LJ and puppy Chino are enjoying family life!

 

I’m starting a new little segment on my blog where I ask my former brides to share their best piece of advice with future brides. I’ve photographed some amazing weddings with some amazingly beautiful, sweet, down-to-earth and intelligent brides and I just know that they would have some pearls of wisdom to share.

So I’m starting with Ashleigh Davidson. Ashleigh and Scott were married in October last year in a beautiful country-style wedding up at Clear Mountain. Both Ashleigh and Scott’s families were the most welcoming people who worked tirelessly to help create the perfect wedding for the pair.

This is what Ashleigh had to share with brides who are in the midst of planning their own weddings:

As far as advice goes, something that really struck me whilst trawling through wedding blogs was one little phrase on a site called A Practical Wedding. It reads "Weddings. Minus the insanity, plus the marriage." Well....HOLY DOOLEY!!!! I felt like stamping this one little phrase on every wedding mag/blog out there!!

It is incredible how much a few little words can impact you, and once I read this my entire mindset shifted. It is so easy to lose yourself in all the tiny details, stressing over how to create a picture perfect day. As ironic as it is, it is actually easy to forget what a wedding is really about.
Once I read that one little sentence things suddenly seemed so clear. I felt an overwhelming sense of relief as I realised that in the end no one will remember what colour nail polish I wore or what font we used on our invites, what they will remember is the tears in our eyes as we said our vows, our beaming smiles and the atmosphere of the day!

So here is my advice: weigh up what is truly important to you and you will have an unforgettable day regardless of what earrings or shoes you wear. Scott and I decided that what was important to us was really quite simple. Vows written in our own words - from our hearts, great friends, good food, honest photography and a fun relaxed atmosphere much like a backyard bbq.

Scott describes the wedding process as throwing a heap of ideas in a box. Like one amazing gigantic puzzle - you really can't predict how it will be put together until the very last piece, you just have to relax and TRUST – surely only something good can come of all your favourite things being pieced together one by one! The best thing about today is that you don't have to follow traditions, or conform to societies expectations. Make the wedding as individual as you two are, and you'll have one hell of a party to celebrate your lifetime together!

Aside from this, the best thing we did was see each other before the ceremony. Take five minutes to look into each others eyes, breathe and take in what the day means to the two of you. It was such an amazing moment and I can't recommend it enough.

Ashleigh, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for writing that! Not only is it great advice for future brides, but it pretty much encapsulates exactly how I feel about weddings, and how I approach weddings through my photography!